I see this birth as death
Memories pierce our grief once again
Your desire
My prayer
Small lights turn the city to blood
How scarcely we envied the sea
Trembling senses make us look further
Find my compassions worth
You speak of leaving
Only the dead escape this torture
And we are still much alive, my love

Angels have now been ruined in mire

Looking to my father

I was supposed to love him

Now sorry for his crimes

A thorn of lightning to embrace my side

Laughable torture

Visceral frustration

I, in my blindness confuse cultivation with love

To have my organs harvested

And my eyes turned to stone

This is what we expect from monsters

A masterpiece of violence

There is fear and anger and nothing else

Now we march to the soul of a salamander

I should have known you were empty

Without awareness, compassion, affection or attachment

Only blind hunger

And where our walk is heavy and the silence is impeded by love, I will be strong and you will know God sees the strength I have to carry you home one more night.

This is all.

Want and need together as one spiraling past the depths we've seen

A creased smile eternally present on my image

This arm exists to close guilt

Your tragedy spoke words but left me to question it anyways

Never separating the fine line of the road and the constant blues your face hums still in the night

And you may plant flowers to the ceiling

You might see bodies laying in the ocean

These numbers slip your pride to a slow rot

You can't collect the moon

Your bottle won't sing, anymore

As if my eyes and heart could feel blood once more

Ribbons of your torn shirt unraveling in space

Trapped

Cold sweat

Electric violence

Tears idling on my face

It's midnight and you're proud

Eternity will keep

Your father only listens to perfection

Deeper infection follows

Your razor blade tongue

There are mountains that broke underneath your whispers to me

I was never seen alive

An endless floor sans you

We enter emotion and hide our breathing

There is freedom here

Machines pierce seasons

Soaking core

Wishing I had closed my eyes

Forced poison

I should have known

Infinite midnight

When you start to scream it goes unnoticed

A feeling where you are already alive but people don't cry for you

Return to a pretense

As a dog wanders streets at night

Brighter lights this time

Counting our steps in the soil

Listening on a hospital bed

I float awareness

Relaxed

Silence

Saved

The rest is missing as your breath fills the room

It cannot be this way

What is left is tainted but remains

For example our embodied love

To see without malice

I move forward in strength

You can smell me on this dark morning

Clarifying this pain was real

Her words have failed

Feeling stained

Your mother unaware

Mistakes save but fade

All right

Loud existence and in a flash

Silence, ******

I no longer realize your power

And we're built to die with better choices

Burst

Closed

Torch the lonely

Float away