I saw a chance for forever in your eyes
Am I blind?
Or are you the one too stubborn to embrace what's standing right in front of you?
I can't stand here much longer
I'm slowly wasting away
All on a gamble
Am I seeing what doesn't exist?
Or are you seeing the world but, too afraid to grab it for fear of losin it?
Well if it is there
Grab me, squeeze tight and don't ever let me go
My heart only beats for you
But, it won't forever
I can't lose out on the unknown because I so badly want you to just be my diamond in the ruff
So open your eyes
See what you see
And hold me
Or release me

Oh, how I want this moment to last
must I consign it to my past
Can I savour its mystery
before it becomes history

I’m holding it tight in my brain
replaying it again and again

I’ll have to let it go
a nice memory, I know
It is with sadness
I let this moment pass

I miss you
You're not missing me
I missed you before you left
You may have missed me for a day or two
I miss they way we'd ride around in your car and stare at the stars
I miss how you used to hold the door open for me
I miss how whenever we sat down no matter who was in the room, you sat so close to me when your arm around me tight
I miss the way it felt to lay on your chest at night
I miss the way we laughed when we woke up to the other one just staring waiting
I miss the way you used to look into my eyes and the whole world disappeared
I miss when you wanted me around all the time
I miss when no one could make me doubt you
I miss the way we used to sit on the couch in "our" house and watch movies , with the puppy curled up besides us
I miss meeting you at work on your lunch breaks
I miss knowing I was the only one who made you smile
I miss being the only one you called "mine"
I miss the days when I trusted you weren't texting someone else
I miss when I trusted you with my life
I miss that sparkle in your eye
I miss how you face lite up when you saw me and we'd both be awkward for a moment or two
I miss that my acceptance used to be enough
I miss that I used to be enough
I miss how you used to hold me and wipe my eyes when I cried
I miss that I missed the moment things began changing
I miss that instead of asking less questions, I just tried to get you to look at me how you used to
I miss the fact that I never knew how serious our problems were
I miss the way I could talk to you like no one else
I miss the day before it all came to head

I don't miss listening to you telling me goodbye and standing emotionlessly
I don't miss how unaffected you seemed by my tears
I don't miss frantically trying to get a hold of you and you ignoring me the whole time
I don't miss you're excuses
I don't miss watching you lie right to my face
I don't miss that you just thought another guy would erase you from my heart
I don't miss how you're such a hypocrite and in the same sentence would beg me to stay in your life
I don't miss all the random moments I burst into tears simply because you weren't there
I don't miss every night I knew you were with her
I don't miss how when the sun came up the next day, you were at my door again
I don't miss how I always let you in, and how I clung to every moment with you
I don't miss the involuteery see saw ride you put me on while you tried to make up your mind
I don't miss all those hours I prayed you'd come back to me
I don't miss how when I would snap and tell you to "*******"
I'd cave the second you text my phone

I miss the vacations we took together
I don't miss the way you seemed to have just forgotten
I miss how you were always getting mad at me for letting people walk all over me
I don't miss how you became one of them
I miss how every time you came around, no other guy could touch me or how you'd put your legs across me to mark your territory
I don't miss how when I did that, you still saw her
I miss when I thought you were so different than every other guy
I don't miss realizing you weren't
I miss how hard it was for you to tell me goodbye and that you had tears in your eyes too
I don't miss that just because she had more money she got to be the one to come visit you
I miss the phone calls every week
I don't miss when she moved in and they stopped
I miss how I never saw this coming
I don't miss that in your mind I'll always be here waiting

I miss you

My worst regret:
I forgot to tell you while your heart
was still kicking that 
I love you
I love you
the last time I saw you,
was march 23, 2008.
(happy birthday)
but you took your yellow bumblebee
coat, caked in ash and cigarette smoke
and you sat in your garage
loaded pistol in the back in case the asphyxiation
was not enough
let me tell you, the exhaust
was more than enough
it spread like wildfire
into my lungs.

13 years old
is a bit young
I blew out the candles
and you blew
out your brains.

I wonder what would have happened
if I told you that
I love you
instead of watching you go
I think we all wonder from time to time.

I remember when there was a time that
you would look at me and my heart would smile,
and I was told, "That is how you know he loves you..."
When your heart smiles.

I remember when I think back on the times when all
I had to do was just think of you and there I go grinning,
feeling giddy and warm like sunshine;
yet I've not felt that in such a long time.

Where did all that go and will I ever get it back,
do you know?  Instead, my heart stopped smiling
and I don't have that grin, that giddiness or
feel warm like sunshine anymore.

Where I'm at it's dark, cold and confined.
I watched you from a distance and saw your
face no more, but I'll always remember those
moments we've shared together and watch
over you from beyond the nethers;

help you to keep alive those feelings of
when your heart smiles, the giddiness
and the warmth of sunshine until
the stars die out; until time erases time.

**Creative Writings -  Reina J. Morris