Is it still classed as mental health
When your tummy warns
You of impending doom
You act accordingly
Only later finding out that
your fears were real
People you wouldn’t want to meet
were in places you were ment to go
And boom was it anxiety
Or was it spiritual connection
Warning you of impending doom.

Anxiety
Forming
Taking shape
Like an alien within
Morphing into
Moving
Stretching
Getting comfortable
Taking over
Until
Paralysis sets in

She wants to feel the softness of feathers upon the tips of her toes
Reaching out for comfort that will surely come
She caresses the moments before midnight
With suger kisses so sweet
Like honey coated forgiveness
She smiles into her lovers eyes of crystal dew
Beyond
Her sences reeling
Twirling, dancing
Like the figurine within an ancient music box
As the music surrounds the childs mind so pure
And yet
There is more captured within
The sweetness is soured only by memories
She paints with fingers in the suger
To forget
There are things so worth forgetting
She sees him sleeping and places
mirrors where his eyes once looked upon her
For now she will see herself
The way he see's
The blood from the girl child dried as he slept
There was to be no more sugered moments
No more honey for him to savour
she had seen
Her worth in his eyes
Such a shame sweet child
She should of loved herself with toes touching feathers
Reaching for a comfort
That would only be found in forgiveness of self
Far beyond the place he sleeps
With mirrored eyes of crystal dew

He awakes to find his beloved drenthed in death
He reaches for moments which never come
Her projection of him so false upon this moment
As in a moments seperation
She sees with her angel presence
The suger he tastes on lips so pure
His tears now mingle with the blood
As he tears her mirrors from his eyes
He understands not
The reason
Why white feathers are falling from the sky

A friendship carved in stone
Strange markings only recognisable to those connected by fate
Destiny spins its wheel
Ever spinning
Ever knowing
We were always ment to walk this way.
The day  feels warmer with you by my side
The wind is less harsh against my skin .
But the sea
The sea still beckons me
Singing it’s song
The sirens call
And I wander  the cliffs looking for a treasure to bring back and lay at your feet
A token of my love
Carved in stone
Like my love for you
born from the womb of understanding
Held by life
Released upon the sea
To float freely on the tide that laps upon the shore.

I feel like spitting pain on the paper
But I’ve run out of ink

Why bother ….
Why …..
      …….

So if your always the one to start a conversation
And if you don’t
They don’t
So I guess that means they don’t want to talk to you
So best leave it
Just don’t bother
Because always being the one
Is a little exhausting
And if they don’t want to talk to you
Why would you make them
So you sit all alone
Wondering ……
Wondering why …..
wondering why bother …..
……… just this …….

I sat on the fence.
The end of the line.
Loving every inch of your soul.
From the distance you waved.
And for a fraction of a moment
I really thought you saw me.
An eternity passed before me the first time our eyes met
Yet still
You’re over there longing for something that will never be me.
You don’t know me
You don’t feel me
You don’t see me at all.
I watched as all your moments crumbled.
I cried when your heart was broken.
I begged god and his angels when I saw you falling crash landing into oblivion.  
But I do not dream of you on warm summer nights.
In fact I don’t ever dream at all anymore.
Dreams are for those who wander aimlessly through corridors and walk through doors that hold hope on the other side .
On the other side of my door I find angels and demons playing poker at my expense and I catch you from the corner of my mind laughing.
I choose to leave you there knowing my soul will burn for less than this.

You drink to forget
The mistakes that you’ve made
You lie to your friends
So easily nowadays
I’m not here to save you
Your like a vulnerable child
But back to those vices
I watch as you cave in
So chiselled and calm
Like there’s no care in the world
That can’t be put right at the end of a bottle
I hate I can’t help you
I love you you know
But off to your vices your readily go
A friendship in tatters
You beg me to not let go
But your making it difficult
Hell don’t you know
Seeing you all tattered and torn at the edges
You don’t love yourself and get into all kinds of messes
I wish we could jump back to when life was more mellow
Gardens and sunshine and fires and music
The love of connection
I’m worried we’ll loose it
You drag round or carry a sheep saved from slaughter
But back she must go as soon as gets older
Your court case is looming
You hurt that beautiful man
Was breaking him apart part of your plan
You tell him you love other people or had flings with your friends and where did you think this would end
I sit and cry tears
I’m not sure what to do
You just don’t listen
You will always do you
And I love you whatever but a distance prevails
You lied to me I don’t take that well
A friendship in tatters
Or a lesson on love unconditional and true
But right now I find it hard to be around you ..

She said she loved you.
Then trampled on your desires.
She said she cared.
But preferred him in the end.
She held you close as your heart broke.
And she then turned away as you surrendered your soul

Sorry is a stupid word.
The thought before the action wasn’t sorry.
The action was meaningful in whatever form it took.
Keep your sorries.
Change the thoughts that run riot and cause chaos.
Action speaks loud.

Love

Lonely word that causes joy and pain and has the weight of the world upon its shoulders .

Only when we love ourselves will we be ready to find true love
Are we born loving ourselves ?
In which case we are just pulling down the brambles that have grown around us to find our way back to self.

Vows made between lovers
To be torn by  
or kept sacred
Only time will tell.

Everlasting renewal
Of feelings that we thought would stay hidden but in reality only sit just below the surface.

This is love
Love is this and so much more

I turned
Quite suddenly
It took my breath away
I looked into his eyes
I sensed
That here
Here
In his eyes

Somehow he felt like home

Egg shells as sharp as the edge of your tongue
And I tip toe
As to not make a sound on your deep pile carpet
Childhood really wasn’t much different
At least I know how to behave
and grateful
At least this isn’t a place I call home