I guess it's time to grow up now. Too many childish things are in the way.
Time to make way for bigger and better things. A new beginning is now forging today.
You see I never gave it much thought. I used to live life free and un-adheared.
Time went on with no recourse, but now, it is just as I feared.
Those childish impulses raged within me and became the routine I knew the best.
All the while life moved on. I never realized...and in these lines I must confess.
I had a woman once. A woman who's mere presence shook me to the bone.
To me her beauty goes unmeasured, on my pedestal she stands alone.
Together we shared something sacred. Ten million words could never explain.
My heart now has a void where there once was fusion. I must now try to transcend this pain.
We met by destiny's doing. It is a memory I hold close to my heart.
Since that fateful day I've know now sorrow. You and I had never been apart.
I didn't start this to tell that story. It was a chapter of life in tranquility.
Those memories deserve to have their pages, but right now those words have escaped me.
That is why I write these pages now. About a life in flux and transition.
Changing my life from child to adult. I can think of no better mission.
My reasons are twofold. I can not only make these changes for her.
These changes I make for me as well. It is a change for "ever after".
She doesn't want me to change for her. She wants me to be happy as I am.
She thought it best for her to leave. That decision left me a mortal man.
I am a man with hope. A hope for dreams laid in reality.
Those dreams have become my motivation, to be the very best that I can be.
This woman has changed my life. She brought out of me the joy and feelings of love.
I thanked God everyday, for bringing me this person from up above.
She thinks that if I change, she doesn't deserve the actions that I would take.
She believes that I would lose who I am, but I too know what is at stake.
I know that change can be dangerous. I know it also to be a wondrous and beautiful thing.
To make these changes now, only helps me realize the true importance of the life it brings.
The child in me can still exist, I do not need to lose all that I am.
The child must now come second. This I choose according to plan.
I have to keep him close. He is a part of me I can not ignore.
Yet now he can no longer take the lead. Not as he always did before.
The change, in words, seems simple. It's an adjustment that is possible when true.
This change at the moment is quite possible, but only worth it with you.
Here I go again. Saying that the change is only for you.
Please do not confuse the issue. Take a step back and watch what I do.
I will put that part of self behind me. And take a stand for the things I hold dear.
I will take my place beside you, soon everything will be clear.
Change is something that needs to happen. You may not know it until it's too late.
With out change there is only one direction. And I can't always go straight.
Fate is believed to have no prediction, something many have come to fear.
My fate is in my own reflection. Only now does this seem clear.
I am in charge of my destiny. Only I can decide what is right for me.
I have decided. Fate plus action, equals my destiny.
Never everything I wanted, always everything I needed, you've been a champion for a man in need.
Now is my time to show my commitment. Now is the time. This is something that will succeed.
Please don't just believe my words. This is something that must be seen as real.
In order to do that you must commit too, and give me strength that I can feel.
I do this for me. I do this for you. I do this for all the world to know.
But really I do this for us. So that our story may have the chance to grow.
The future is yet unwritten. Don't pretend to know what is to be.
The future is what we make it. Dreams can become reality.
So I write these words for you woman, not to convince you of what I can become.
I write these words so that I have direction. Only without you did I know what needed done.
Please show me that you believe. Show me that my new path can lead me back to you.
Hand in hand, out hearts together, there is no telling what we can do.
You must choose yourself. You must decide that which is to be.
I can only hope you choose in my favor. That would mean so much to me.
I'm going to change with or with out you. This I've decided anyway.
These changes will start a new life for me, starting with these words today.
In these words I've said much. I've told a story that is fit to be here.
A story of redemption...of how I am going to face all that I fear.
I fear you've chosen already. A path that leads away from what I've already become.
That would be a choice apprehensive. A choice made with out believing what can be undone.
Believe in your fear. It is the strength that points the way.
Makes you question what is right. You don't want to go astray.
Do not be consumed by fear. Something this has been known to do.
Look for me to give you strength. One, can be so much less than two.
We both have growing up to do. You have been the one to start it first.
I guess it's true about maturing. Girls start early, and boys are the worst.
You've only now made this decision. And you're trying hard to find your way.
Well my decision was right behind you. "Let's fight this one together, O.K.?"
We've come this far together you and I, to be able to suffer times like these.
If we can make it through this, I'll no doubt ask you a question that requires my bended knees.
This is the future I speak of. A one that is yet still a dream.
All it needs are You and I. Together let's be that team.
And now I leave you with that choice. I think I've said all I can say.
I give you all the strength I can muster. It will be you choice anyway.
Take care sweet woman. And know that I love you true.
I will accept what you decide. Do this not for me but for you.
Matt Segin
03/05