What I wouldn't do
to be a fly on my own walls,
The very same walls
of built up frustration,
hurt and pain;
these walls of mine
are back again
I want to see what others see
and feel what they feel
when they see me
I want to know how I am
so I can find myself again

I gazed upon a bed
of trampled weeds
and early blooms;
their bodies crushed
and soft white petals
wilted to the ground
For them,
fear was their only sound
A few brave stems,
wavering in an effort to stand tall
desperately helping
the others to not fall,
dripped of strength and courage
I swayed fearlessly
with them in the softest breeze
as a new rain sprinkled
them with hope

It is for them that I pray tonight

Such is life

Only life,
in all its vibrant colors
and peculiar shapes,
can grab you
by the whisp of your hair
Only life can hurl
you into a tragic doom
when there was once
happiness in the air
and then sudden gloom

Take for example,
the quaking grounds
of a now old Nepal
or the silent road
that suddenly
engulfed my mother
and took her
from everything sweet;
took away the pillars of me
that lie in her feet

Or perhaps the children maimed
in Afghanistan
to prove a religiously
political point
And the children that should be playing
are now training to do the slaying
In another country,
same moment as one's death,
a child is born.  Rebirth
Life is funny that way,
amazingly sweet
and bitter too;
so easy to misconstrue

Today's breath
can be so easily distorted
and lapse silently
into tomorrow's emptiness

Such is life

Finally, a gentle reprieve
warm, comforting arms
engulfing me
helping me to grieve
helping me believe
that everything will be ok
This new road has just started
and the journey is long
Right now I'm in limbo
I don't seem to belong
to anything but a deep emptiness
But he is here now
arms wide and warm smile
Perhaps now, everything will be ok

Another day has come and gone;
a Tuesday forlorn
The sunlight hid behind clouds of grey
Raindrops sprinkled throughout the day
Another gloomy day for sure
Until I felt a whisper soft
against my shoulders wide
I snuggled within my mothers cardigan
and could feel her by my side
Her arms warm across my waist
A whispers kiss against my face
I could feel her by my side
Raindrops sprinkled still
throughout the day
and the sunlight hid
behind clouds of grey
but I felt her whisper soft
and I truly felt her by my side
I love you mom

Respond
squeeze tight my hand
blink soft your eyes just once
show me you are fighting, or else
I'll break

Reply
twitch your fingers
to the sounds of my voice
show me somehow, someway, or else
I'll break

Release
me from your pain
the sadness in your eyes
I feel in me mom, and for you
I ache

Wake up
speak to me soft
shake my hand, scream out loud
get up from that bed now!  But please
don't quit

Bleeding heart

Her hands are soft and leather worn
and her heart is beating strong,
but she is torn
Bones are scattered,
ribs shattered
and then the other matters
She is fighting for her life, my mom
Through all the pain
and incredible fears,
I have yet to see her tears
but I can feel them through her eyes
I can hear her silent cries
When she squeezes my hand
and squint her eyes -
my heart sighs
Her tears I can feel
her pain I can only imagine
I just want her to know I am here
My heart is bleeding in fear
I just want my mom back at home