On my list is almond dealer, armadillo, zodiacal and Pearl McBroom and I have to finish it by the fifteenth or risk not getting double my money back. I might just order ice cream and not pay for it. People who sell ice cream have more money than God so it's time they got a taste of their own medicine for a change.

ONE DAY AT THE BASE OF MOUNT EVEREST Lola met Nigel, a handsome mountaineer with a heart of gold. He was from England and had lots of **** warts. "What's wrong?" She asked in a concerned voice. "You wouldn't understand," he answered shyly. "I'll bet it's **** warts," she said like a psychic. "How did you know?" He asked. "I wrote a book called 𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘰 𝘛𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘪𝘧 𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘍𝘶𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘉𝘰𝘺𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘏𝘢𝘴 𝘈𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘞𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘴," she stated before plunging her hand down his pants to yank an **** wart out. "Jesus Christ! Why'd you do that?!" He screamed in pain. "Shut your cake-hole you ***** or I'll slit your throat!" She shouted while nearby mountaineers ran for their lives.

Donna felt the peacefulness of Lola's warm smile as they climbed to the top of Mount Everest together, hand-in-hand. "Lola, pass the hand lotion," said Donna. "Get it yourself. Who was your African-American last week?" Lola responded.

Mary? What are your memories of your great grandfather? None because he died 26 years before I was born. And your third cousin Marvin? Never heard of him. Do you like ice cream? Yes. And puppies? Yes. And ice cream with puppies in it? No. Have you been pregnant? No. Why? Because I have no womb, only ******. Where? Several inches below my hips. May I see? No. I'll give you ice cream with puppies in it! You've got a deal!

Donna began writing as a teenager, about other teenagers who lived desperate lives in the vast world of desperate teenagers. Donna's book, 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘋𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘓𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘛𝘸𝘰 𝘛𝘦𝘦𝘯𝘢𝘨𝘦𝘳𝘴, chronicles the teenage years of Kerry, a confused teenager and Lola, a mixed-up teenager who longs to escape the bonds of teenage desperation.