FOR SALE: Gay bed (designed by the late Richard Simmons) for 2 gay men to sleep in. This bed has it all: pink cotton filling and extra loose springs for bouncy-bounciness. Order now for $1,000 or $500 plus 90 easy payments of $12.

I took my ***** to a movie because it was a whorish movie that she could relate to. She was so happy. I bought popcorn and Pepsi and together we watched enthralled. It was a great film with Tom Cruise as Brandon, a tough, *****-beaten homosexual with a death-wish and then there was Kandee, a tough, *****-beaten homosexual with a death-wish. Later, after arriving at her trailer, we recreated the important scenes from the movie, each of us using fake voices and wearing no underwear.

"Are you **** Pleasureman's wife, Sandy?" A **** Pleasureman fan begged to know. "Yes, I am," Sandy replied automatically, if not robotically. "I've just read 𝘗𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘈𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘞𝘰𝘮𝘢𝘯 𝘞𝘩𝘰 𝘑𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘎𝘰𝘵 𝘙𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘍𝘦𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘭 𝘗𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘰𝘯 and it was great!" The fan proclaimed fanatically. "You're very kind," Sandy replied warmly. "**** will be pleased." Later that day Sandy met **** at the bowling alley for lunch even though neither of them bowled except when forced to at gun-point by international terrorists.

CALLING ALL MOCKERS AND DREAMERS AND CAULKERS AND REAMERS! Driven by untamed desires, young Richard Burton bled his last rat and ran from the coal mine like a Gypsy with a head wound. His brothers chased after him, slinging ***** nuts & shoe inserts till they grew more tiredly useless than a fly swatter lost in ice water. "I'll marry a fat woman, fatter than Liz Taylor before crapping out at 58!" Richard exclaimed like he was totally deluded.