𝑺𝒖𝒛𝒚 𝐁𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐤𝐲

𝑺𝒖𝒛𝒚 𝐁𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐤𝐲 Feb 23

I'm more solid now than a wig behind a curtain. I can throw shoes at horses and eat with one of your hands tied behind my back like it's no harder than training farmers with no thumbs to ****** hoes till the pigs get wind of what's going down in ghetto town.

𝑺𝒖𝒛𝒚 𝐁𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐤𝐲 Feb 23

BRIDGET LOVES BERNIE while Gidget scrubs Ernie?! You're makin' me wanna die! If I wasn't in the Mafia I'd **** you! Here, take my hand and keep it iced till I can get it grafted back onto my wrist!

𝑺𝒖𝒛𝒚 𝐁𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐤𝐲 Feb 23

What have I learned as a gynecologist? Many things. Gynecology isn't just for dentists who like women. It's for men who enjoy big-game fishing and bowling-pin setting. It's for ex-lesbians with bullet scars on their butts.

𝑺𝒖𝒛𝒚 𝐁𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐤𝐲 Feb 23

(¯`◕‿◕´¯) 𝐌𝐎𝐒𝐓 𝐏𝐄𝐍𝐍𝐒𝐘𝐋𝐕𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐀𝐍𝐒 𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐛𝐲 𝐣𝐮𝐦𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐰𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐛 𝐭𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐬. 𝐈𝐭'𝐬 𝐚 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐧𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐥 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐈.𝐐.'𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐥𝐞 𝟒𝟕.

𝑺𝒖𝒛𝒚 𝐁𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐤𝐲 Feb 23

"Give me an inch, and I'll take me a mile! Give me the distance from your supercilious smile!" - Hazel O'Connor from her album 𝘉𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘎𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘴 (1980)

𝑺𝒖𝒛𝒚 𝐁𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐤𝐲 Feb 23

I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL! I felt that way too before I cut my fingers off.

𝑺𝒖𝒛𝒚 𝐁𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐤𝐲 Feb 23

DUMB DADDY DAY IN DAYTON

I want 2 pus burgers, 2 blood-clot fries, 1 bowel pie with extra mucus, and a small diet Coke. Daddy, I hate this place. Son, hatred is a terrible thing. Here, I got something for you. What is it? A bucket of rancid pig entrails.