It was all I wanted. To be close to him, as close as our human forms would allow us, as close as words would get us. Without the neighboring stares, the waiting appointments, the frequent calls. To be absolutely alone, just two beating hearts stopping time and motion.

I knew, of course, that these were all affairs of the mind. That if I were to gather enough willpower I could suppress these hindering fears and obstacles and I would be able to succumb to my present, to my very latent and waiting task.

But I couldn't divorce the thought that I ought to be interrupted from loving him at any time and that I may not be able to love again, in the same way.