the heart breaks
when it realizes separation is permanent.

first, to the stomach
then to the knees
to the toes
and finally into the ground.

i remember saying "leave me alone"
but i don't recall it being so static.

the permanence of it is what kills me.

i didn't mean what i said
or thought
or listened to.

but i realize i did.

and the fact that i realize
has me swimming
in petroleum jelly.

that will never heal wounds.

only hinder.

forever.