The cancer
it filled you and made a home
and I wanted nothing more than for someone or something
to save you
It hurt seeing you get
more and more skinnier
You weren't you anymore
you were a skeleton
and at the age of twelve
I really didn't understand death
or the pain that comes with a loss
The should'ves would'ves and could'ves still
haunt my mind
but the worst part is that you don't know when
that day comes
when you're supposed to get in that last goodbye
I don't have a good enough memory to remember
the last moment I shared with you
but I'm sorry for not sharing enough
You weren't perfect
you yelled and sometimes got too angry
but just know that you're forgiven for your wrongs
I loved you at twelve, I love you now at nineteen
and sometimes I can still feel how empty it can be
without you
even after all this time
but I embrace the pain
because you're at least deserving of
that