It  seems lately my dreams are my only refuge

I wake and the same unsettling,
burdensome thoughts rush in.

soul heavy.

I drag it around throughout my day

clarity crashing in .
and-consequently,
****** back out and away

my head recently just barely above water

I am beginning to fear I may drown,
drown  in my own pathetic tears of uncertainty

what a melancholy disaster  I have turned out to be

Yet,

Each  day
(insanity )

I continue to wake,
wishing to stay in my dreams

And each day as I go through each motion ..
I feel further away

grasping .

Grasping ,

for solutions to my heavy heart

and so , the tears continue
and so, the storm rages on

and so ,

I find myself once again
with my head
just barely above water.