I have lived most of my life believing that I was not desirable by those who I desired. It was easier that way.

Every so often, I would let myself believe otherwise.

Stupid, stupid me.

The reason why you build walls is to keep the nasty things out, to keep them where they can't hurt you.

You worked very hard to get me to lower my walls. I didn't even realize you were doing it until it was done.

I didn't realize it was a game to you, because it was not a game to me.

You made me feel worthy. You made me feel elite. You made me believe.

That's not really what you wanted. Like a dog chasing a car, you didn't know what to do with me once you caught me.

When you pulled back the curtain, I couldn't help but feel blind. It took time to regain my bearings.

I'd say I'm back to normal now, with one thing changed: I see the truth.
I may be worthy, but not in your eyes.

Your actions didn't hurt me; you kept your promise. Your inaction, on the other hand, eats me from within.

I am trying to be stronger; to not need others to feel what I want to feel. You, with your games, helped me with that.

I also learned a greater truth: it doesn't matter what they think. And for that, I thank you.