allegiances shift; those who once loved each other now hold tight to grudge. one reason, two reason, black sooty handprint slapmarks on the ***, on the face, on the chest, on the rest... raindrenched beauty translated into achy-bone-break loneliness beer ****** drug addictions constant fall from grace-- as if the void of action gave way to unnecessary criticism, phantasmal attack, reasons to judge as if it were anyone's place (everyone's place) and you can dole out the truth yet never take it when it's given.. the rain and the forest are so still and yet the rain eventually runs like blood, pools at your feet, leaves and branches like guts and wind like sharp-pain hack-coughs from the root of the solar plexus.. happy I left what it became in my mind, and yet (somehow) the bitter-blood still reaches out, plague-like, to tick the back of the mind and say: 'remember where you came from' 'remember who you were.'