don't know
how to feel when
I see your face.

hastily shove on
this mask  and
become
prepared and
blank powerful
and cold.

angry to be
full of so much
sadness, blocked
beyond pain.

and  then I morph.

into some sort
of businesslike
zombie who
packs up this part
of her life.

cobbles together
her dignity.

andgetsthehelloutbeforesheremembershowtocry
again.