i feel

    my ankles roll and fingers
crack. my eyes hurt.

i close the laptop and lie on
my bed
        in the dark.       in the dark.

why
        why
                why
    am
      i
   here.
          am i not gone
are you not gone.
away from me.

shadows creep across my room
the light leaks in from the street.

the night will be over soon and
morning will come and the
   sun
     will
rise
         rise
    rise
                   rise.

i wash the light from my
    eyes
              eyes
        eyes
                       ­   eyes.

  still searching for
the answer
        to the question that
      i havent asked.

my back hurts
every time           that i wake
       every time           that i rise
the sun high in the
                          clouds.

and at night i lie in the dark
      ( in the dark )
and I anxiously
    wait for the sun to
  r
  i
  s
  e
  .