I can feel the tears building
as my eyes remain fixated on the night
aiming to focus on a vision I cannot quite see
I know I am tired and that I should sleep but what joy would fill my emotions if I could just hang my head and cry

But I cannot

And it is for that exact reason why I lay here in the darkness waiting to see a sight of satisfaction in my dreams
I know I have nothing to lose and all to live for and my blessings are en route but sometimes you have to let the water run dry

but I just cannot

I've become far too numb to cry

I can feel the wretched pain crumbling my insides and the butterflies have gathered in a heap of smoke
I can feel the abandoned broken pieces of my heart slowly coming together to make a sound of any life

And yet as I try to speak of foreshadowed unruly motions the words get hung on my teeth and the sounds never leave my throat
And yet the pit of my pain keeps boiling over in my head it is in my chest where these horrors reside

And all of this happens
because I am far too numb
to cry