i know i've said that it hurts most at night, and screaming into your pillow at 2am is the romantic, glorified equivalent of constantly feeling cheated emotionally bruised and too far away from him,
but sometimes, it’s 10am on a monday morning and you’re leaning on the kitchen sink waiting for the toast to pop up and the smell of dusty sunlight and chamomile tea makes you miss. him. so. much. that you don’t know what to do with your hands.
today, i closed his bus tickets in the front page of a composition book filled with every poem i've ever written about him, and i'm planning on sending it tomorrow. i couldn't stop smiling and the thought of him opening it. this is what it is to be in a long distance relationship. you experience almost all of it by yourself, despite your happiness. the little things mean so much more. i have never tasted anything more bittersweet.