I am not sure what this numbness is
I can feel longing aching in my bones
My desires are whimsical and paradisiacal
I crave touch
And the tickle of breath on the small of my neck
I want to feel warmth against me
I yearn for hands in tangled hair
And lips caressing cheeks.
What it would be to feel alive.
What it would be to stay up all night.
What it would be to stand in the chilling winter air
inhaling your fumes of smoke, tainting my innocence.
What it would be to feel whole
But I am not in love (with you) and there is a void where my heart used to be.