Vulnerable, my heart bled out on the table between us
Pulsing out the only life I had left
(Or so I thought)
I told you everything
Every feeling and regret
Your arms barricaded around me
Safety and reassurance
Warmed my soul
You weren’t laughing or discarding my emotions
You listened
And that’s all I could have asked for
I told you  
How I believed in you
How I loved how much you cared for your family
How I knew you’d make it far
A boy turning into a man with a good head on his shoulders
But as I looked at you I only saw regret
Not for not being able to call you mine
But for not believing in myself enough to take a chance
A chance on something that could have been everything I thought it would be
I saw a boy I cared for
A boy I will never stand beside but at an arms distance of friendship
And I realized
I’m okay with that  
And that I have so much to give
So much and I just can’t hold it in, but
All this love and passion I held for you wasn’t…
For you
It was meant for someone else
Someone I haven’t met yet
Someone who’s just as good of a listener as you are
But will give everything I give back and so much more
A boy who will shower me in
Affection and appreciation
I will always care for you
And I will always be here for you
Never doubt that
But I need to start being there for me
Loving myself and feeling worthy
Because I’ve come to realize my best friends boyfriends
Arms are not where I belong