it feels wrong to say your name out loud because why would you not be here if you still exist
it feels wrong scared to be the the last one at the party but everyone went home and it's getting weird now i gotta get over this
but i'm still crying on my way to work and mentally feeling for you in the dark or specifically the way you made my happiness real and it seem possible not to starve
like the first fire in existence first came curiosity followed by trials of trust cold then warm and safe then charred what you love just eats you right up
and it's so much harder to put the drink down when the bottle is staring at you i want to forget about it all most days but that is not a can-do attitude
it feels wrong but i have to do it anyway the quietest part of me wants you back but the rest does what its supposed to do
it feels wrong to feel but no longer know you're like a shape behind the curtains and i'm avoiding that half of the room
but i spend every breathing moment imagining it's contents almost believing that the other side's still warm that you're just outside the door
but that sounds wrong i was just leaving actually what was the problem what was this for
i want to look at you and pretend you're someone i'm supposed to recognize