I cried again today and I hated myself for it. Every tear feels like your winning a battle you don’t even know your apart of.

I’m cursed to over feel, overthink, over believe. Hope is the cruelest of emotions as hope hardly ever does prevail. Maybe when hope is a big picture - being alive, countries winning wars- it’s really something. But on the smaller side if hope -heartbreaks, job promotions, not crying ever time I listen to that song- it possibly the worst thing a person could possible feel.

But here I am hoping. I hope you miss me, I hope you’ll want me back, I hope you’ll love me, I hope this will stop hurting, I hope I’ll make through the first 5 seconds of the morning without thinking about you. I hope one day I’ll be good enough, I hope I’ll be worth staying for, I hope someone is devastated at the very thought of me not being around.