our love was corporeal once
soft between my fingers
til it burnt into my mind
then faded to an afterimage

i try and revisit the intensity
poking where i'm sore
and either feel nothing
or begin to curl in from the sickness

of a beauty i can't unsee
names i can't say
the love i once had
branded by the experience

i was superfluous and a liability
so i was left like fingerprint
right there but invisible in all ways that mattered
evidence never taken serious

now i hear whispers
and pretend that i'm deaf
i did let it go
but that doesn't mean you're absolved

i apologized then
because i knew that's what you wanted
never took it back but i never should've
my caring doesn't make me wrong


i remember when it all first happened
i prayed to feel the way i do now
but i never accounted for
the nagging melancholy of former glory

i'm fine now and i will stay that way
but i'm also mourning you
while you still walk this earth
it's strained and a strange way to live

my consciousness feels for the lightswitch sometimes
like i might wake up and it was all a dream
it's very much over but you're woven in my being
and i might not like it but a very fragile part of me

touch is just no longer an option
is all