I will not lie
To tell the truth
There's not a condiment
That I won't use
To dip my chips
Or smother fries
Mayonnaise
Ketchup on the side

With the versatility
Of ranch dressing
Pay close attention
To this lesson
Add siracha please
For a spicy quest
Heavy handed
With the squeeze no less

And when it comes
To sandwich dip
Thousand Island
Makes for the perfect trip
Taking you straight to
Paradise
There's not a condiment
That I don't like

Mustard never
Is at a loss
When complimenting
The Hot Dog
On a stick
Or in a bun
Apply it as
Thick as you want

When it comes
To anything
Deep red meat
Or leafy green
I will not lie
To tell the truth
There's not a condiment
That I won't use