I'm numb Maybe in a depressed state For sure in a depressed state It's grief Again
You've left We've said our goodbyes And it felt inadequate Less than what I imagined it would be
I left numb And it has carried with me since
Goodbyes are sacred And yet I ******* hate them Yet this time There was no ghosting No bitterness left unsaid
We came As best as we could To each session And as all seasons tend to go It ended Maybe paused We shall see in autumn What out souls find to be true About what happens to us Our dynamic relationship
I feel incomplete Like there's this itch I must've thought I scratched But I realize now I didn't Oh well The depressed state I'm in doesn't seem to worry much about it now
No one wrote this blueprint in life for me Much of anything else So as I've done before I do now Trailblaze into a territory unknown Except this time I no longer have her next to me In the way I did before
It's been weird since kemp left. I've busied myself and it has been helping. I feel and welcome the numbness. Utterly devastated but the anger tampers the sadness. I wonder if other ancestors before me have had a spiritual guide or counselor or therapist that they've had to say goodbye to.