Two simple words plague my life
They cause me so much pain and suffering, thinking of past events that did not come to light.

“What if?”

“What if I was not strong enough to survive, when I was at my lowest?”

“What if in the end, I did give in and allow myself to sink into the nothingness.

“What if I am never enough?”

“What if I am just too much?

“What if?” Is the question that constantly starts up the hurricane that is my mind.

I despise asking myself that, because I know I am in for one hell of a fight, as soon as I hear the voices of my dark thoughts throw that into the void.

What if, "What if turns" out to be right?

These words, I ask myself way too often.
These words, I never want to be real...