i was fine being alone,
but after that 5 hour long,
i haven’t been myself anymore
so freaking different from before

this weird feeling of misery,
when my day ends without your company;
this new, strange habit of smiling unconsciously,
when i remember things—you, basically;
this constant cycle of longing desires i have for you,
and not wanting to,
only to conclude that i’m missing you;
this odd mood swing that i suffer with,
from hating you, to liking you more,
when you suddenly appear,
realizing how it’s not complicated to forgive;
this persistent idea of clinging onto your life,
being unimaginably patient when i never was,
foolishly opening my eyes wide,
so that you won’t have to wait that much

—𝙨𝙝𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙘𝙖𝙢𝙚 𝙞𝙣𝙨𝙖𝙣𝙚𝙡𝙮 𝙘𝙝𝙞𝙡𝙙𝙞𝙨𝙝, 𝙞𝙣 𝙨𝙤 𝙢𝙖𝙣𝙮 𝙬𝙖𝙮𝙨