He *** depressed not waiting to do anything. He didn't play with his bass. He wrote with his true feelings. He was always up beat and positive, but all the toxic around him infected him.
He was always thankful and grateful others had way more blessings. He didn't want to quit or give up on life.
He thought about jujitsu but was fighting with his health issues. He wanted to get back on the mats. He did too much and got burnt out or he did extra feeling it wasn't enough.
Some days he wanted to scream punch the wall be free. He felt okay but something was telling him it's over. He fought his way out resisting the the mind tricks. Trying to stay above water like he's drowning being pulled under. Trying to survive while others lived and some died on borrowed time.