part of the job…

tending the garden of friendships…
mine is small and select, never been
a great gardener of human beings,
satisfied with tulips, peonies and lilacs,
a little isolationist, a little lazy, and
a little particular, looking for them
gems worthy of life-long savoring

for I,
am the sum of the weight of my history, my deeds,
my disbeliefs, murderous deeds, weak choices
and that hasn’t changed nary an ounce, no matter
many times examined, indeed I am forever a lesser man,
internal infernal

but

not so inward pointed that
I freely cherish the simplest smile, the gentle poking
in my side, a version of mmm loving you, better yet,
a kindly finger stroking a smooth cheek daily,
a little dilly dally
reminding
you need another
to complete the whole
job