I was never able to stop loving you
And sometimes when I least expect it
I remember that and it tears me apart
I cry myself to sleep thinking of what we could have been

You taught me what it meant to be loved
How it felt
You taught me how to fall in love
And what it meant to lose it

But you never broke my heart,
I was never able to sever that sense of longing
If the competition of who loved who more
Ever named a victor,
It would be me

Because I wrote poetry about you as a friend
As I fell in love with you and the way I denied it
How I tried to push the feelings aside  
To be your ally when you needed me to be
How I conceded and realized
I was only lying to myself

I wrote about you as I fell in love,
As I fell deep and hard
I wrote when we were together
I wrote about my longing
About my desire and adoration,
About how I fell deeper and deeper
I wrote about futures and dreams

I also wrote about when it all ended,
About all the tears I shed in secret
About the pain I'd felt for the first time,
Of losing something I cherished so deeply

I wrote about how I couldn't stop loving you
No matter how hard I tried
About pushing my feelings aside
And sacrificing them to be your devoted friend,
About how that tore me up inside

I wrote about how no matter how many years passed,
I couldn't make the feelings dissipate any less
I realized in every letter I wrote,
That I would never be able to stop loving you,
And that it would have to be okay,
Even if it felt like it never would

I love you,
Even today
And while I may never call you mine again,
I will always be yours