You chose a coward's goodbye
But
That's always been your move
I can see now all the times you've bolted
At the eleventh hour
All the ways you've held me in limbo
You want things both ways
All ways
Regardless of the destruction

I've broken myself endlessly on the
Jagged hope
You've dangled at me
Because at the end of every cycle
When the snake inevitably eats its tail
You renege on it all

The absolute worst part
Is that you didn't have to keep
Offering

I told you I was happy
And I wasn't lying
Told you I'd found peace for once
And you
Selfish, impulsive, unthinking
Ripped open every old wound
And pranced away from the fallout

I never deserved this

I'm not a balm for your boredom
Nor a contingency plan
I won't spend my life absorbing the
Thoughtlessness
Of boys who won't grow up
You wouldn't pick a side
So I did
Even though it gutted me
Even though it left me bleeding out
One last catastrophe
For old time's sake
Because you chose the coward's path
So I chose my own