There is a man who thinks he's in charge,
he's strong, dumb and very large.
Twenty foot tall and that's a fact,
twenty and a half to be exact.
He can crush you with his bare hands,
you better obey his list of demands.
Not the devil, not a god,
just a huge man who's very odd.
Not a monster, not a myth,
just a man you can't mess with.
Stomps on people just for fun,
chaos for him has just begun.
He can **** you with his mighty fist,
its the third demand on his list.
Can't speak a word only grunts,
eats babies and smokes big blunts.
If he kicks, you will land a mile away,
his nasty teeth are filled with decay.
Getting shot just makes him mad,
will not stop killing til he finds his deadbeat dad.
His demand list has only five things,
you must call him the king of kings.
He has a name, please call him Rick,
or he'll slap you with his seven foot ****.
You already know number three,
he'll punch you if you don't agree.
You don't wanna know number four,
but trust me it will lead to gore.
Killing his father is number five,
keep out of his way, if you wanna stay alive.
Five is as high that he can count,
his dads head he wants to mount.
Giving birth killed his poor mom,
her body exploded like a bomb.
He's only twenty, grew one foot a year,
not even old enough to drink a beer.
Found his dad and ripped off his head,
he actually smiled after the father was dead.
Rick became a very nice guy,
now he is friendly and very shy.
Rick died when he was thirty,
at the wake, Weird Al sang White And Nerdy.
His ashes are in a six foot urn,
this sad story will now adjourn.