how must i feel when the older i get, "life is a suffering," is a belief harder to forget, is this because i've looked in the eyes of death and found such restful freedom yet to turn everything i was, i am, and will be into a mosaic, a picturesque, a fading silhouette.
IA
11.01.21.| few weeks ago i was deeply in love with life, maybe i still am but this grief is making its own home inside me; the paradoxical heaviness & emptiness existing simultaneously that i think of death as a restful solace.