The walls that whisper while I walk
Seemingly pressing closer
Soon to be caving in on me
Soon to be whispering my cries

I'm called on in a class
A sea of heads turn towards me
Like seagulls staring at a struggling squid
Ready to swoop and snack on their afternoon meal

I open my mouth but nothing comes out
No answer to the question that I've already forgotten
No way to take the spotlight off of me
No way to escape

They call it shy, I call it wanting no one to look my way
Wanting nothing to be wanted from me
Wanting to not need to "speak up"
Or "voice my opinions", or "be more social"

They call it anxiety, I call it the monster that tugs at my vocal chords
The monster that feeds off my silence
That hisses at social gatherings
And pounces at excuses to leave

This monster is my downfall
But I don't have to submit
I don't have to bow down or worship
I can choose to fight it

People will not stand to judge me
For battling my own wretched beast
And it seems that if they do
They have one of their own at least.