This person has a headache,
Another’s got the flu,
Someone has a broken heart,
The other’s got a bruise.

She’s got a paper cut,
He has many scars,
Their *** is really boring,
Some dude stole the car.

One guy’s got an ache,
One girl's got a pain,
“Doctor, please prescribe us something,
strong enough to fry our brains!”

Everyone has a problem,
In our mind or on our skin.
When did life become the game
that only pills can win?