Dreaming in Moonshine  
Soaking into songs heard only through  
The vibrations of insect wings  

Breathing in their scented infusions within a double scene inside another unfolding painted image of what appears to be
A still depleting life  

Casting shadows over my restless thoughts of both promise and deceit which constitutes the inner fold of what is love…  
the counterfeit of existence
that lends itself to real
What is real (in my world)?

Coming forth to me
in moments in phases from
within  
the possible  
  
That lingers until the end of pond’s length  containing the infinite drops that continue to fill it up  by the immaculate hand of heaven’s reach  
entrapping the limits   that give shape to such incongruity  

(There  are always limits in the future even though there are so many possible ones in life- even if there are so many possibilities for us to see, to understand, to believe in, and to experience)

Traipsing into waters unknown  
I learn the diligence of the dragonfly who hinges  
on existential wings  

On this journey of trial and error  
I discover freedom wholly through the mystification of my own will and the emancipation of choice
only to be surrounded by the empty court of judgment  


Seeing through buzz eyes  dripping in nectar  
an opalescent tune raises its brow  
to trigger  
The wind, which blows against the tenderness of heart yet calm and  
(flowing) as if through a wand  

swaying in the glory  
that fate whispers in between the spaces of anorexic branches meeting  


How can the iridescence of a sound, of a single word

Press with such kindness and bathe in such grandeur  

I am amazed by the purity; by the simple beauty of this world  


I recall someone telling me that just once in your life do you meet

the one who gives you the belief you never could find


The deep  

stirring  

(surge)

of your spate  

running inside  

the cord of your spine

How is that I am free today?


I wish for immortal meaning :


(self- reproach)  

does not lead to fill me  


Questioning …

but simply knowing  

the stars  


As they look to me  

and choosing not to shine  

on skin  

not even  

into eyes of gold


they look down on me

mocking insecurity  

This is my reality at its core  


As they move  further  
in between their departing  


within a space  

of sky  

do they laugh  

subconsciously  

behind  the falsity

of a perfect smile  

looming  


while the moon just sits up straight  

and smirks beside  

with faint and covered faces

squinting eyes  


Never  hinting

that this could all be just a dream  

Unjust Inside these walls


But I know like a dream they will return  

to keep me company in the mist (of shadows)  

of a nightmare inside  

I’m now in battle
to avoid                                                            ­                                                                 ­                                 


At times I feel slighted  

yet wholly redeemed  

I feel respected  yet abused beyond all things

and sometimes it feels like I’m standing in front of the altar alone

(on the edge of the dock)  

peering down at everybody I’ve ever known  

about to dive in  
to land on slippery greens floating swiftly in between (the ripples)

I feel chosen
Yet  
I feel unseen  

Dispraised for the things I’ve done

feeling no pain

do I fade...

Away  

into the lambent (lucent)mist of efficacy:  

into the Elysian fields of transcendent virtue  


And there do I become everything I’ve ever loved, everyone I’ve ever known  

Only knowing that Love's darkest form is that of deceit in the illusion of each day, I am still. But more than that, I am still alive.
Thank you for saving my life.