There once was an brave mushroom
Who happened to be named Clyde.

Clyde had a quaint little log
Inside which he did reside.

He had strong opinions on politics
Which created a bit of a divide.

Clyde never let this get to him
And to the haters, he exposed his backside.

It was for this outrageous action
That he became known worldwide.

Clyde used his new popularity
To speak out against mushroom genocide.

He attracted the attention of the revered Society of Toadstools
They, just like him, were rather dissatisfied.

Clyde and the Toadstools went to the king
Who told them his hands were tied.

The queen, angered by her husband’s apathy
Exclaimed that the killings were unjustified.

Clyde and the Toadstools stared in awe
As the queen strode away from his side.

“I have a solution for this,” she announced
“We shall rid the human murderers with cyanide!”

Clyde and the Toadstools, though frightened,
Still with her plan complied.

Inside the human structures they released the gas
Finally, with glee, watched as the humans died.

Clyde and all the other fungi spent the rest of their days in peace
And tales of their bravery that live on are not one bit glorified.