now i am on
page 81
put upon
karma´s song

not to mention
c  white skin
red red in
eye green

lonely mine
small blue van
tulip maddened
loving

i was kind
she said n man
i was kind
joes garage

budgies
cats
molly and
morcha

to combat
depression
i painted
or

went fishing
c
would say
something

that destroyed
me
then she
told her m and

d
what we did
over dinner
honey


sometimes we
had fun
sometimes
c

and then
someone again
i suffered
like anyone cared

i tried to
give hope
la
we recited

leonard cohen
i worked
on my
guitar

i had some
******* breakdowns
b
i was in pain

nearly all the time
fed yo skinny
***
s


ii

waited
i read
hemmingway
not for

me
read
dostoyevski
went to


iii
see fiet
in her canal house
boat
with 26 cats

8 dogs
and a chicken
she gave hot
t

to me
she rushed
in her 2cv
she laughed

and said i
was a lady
kind to me
kind to me

i went to
the riks
museum
jan steen
said she

a minor
but the anarchy
of that sweet

era
there is fun
in her huge
pile of

books
skaters  zipped
past
a cat

everywhere
heat
once children
brought her

a swan
and she gave it
a kiss
and it flew

off
fiet
sunday
depression

smiling...