Sep 2020
It’s crazy how “home” changes as you grow older.
When I was a kid, home was the place where I spent my days with my brother and sister.
My parents were there.
My dogs were there.
I had never known any other place where I could rest my head every night.
When I graduated from high school, home changed.
I moved to the city and slept there every night instead.
Home was my dorm with my friends and a view of the skyscrapers.
But it didn’t feel like home,
At least not all the way.
The people I had spent my entire life with weren’t there with me.
My heart was spread across two cities.
When I left the dorms I moved into a townhouse in the park and that was home for a while.
My new friends were there.
That house hosted so many parties, movie nights, and therapy sessions with my roommates.
We filled that home with love, good food, and memories.
Once I graduated I moved back in with my parents.
Technically I was “home”, but it didn’t feel like it used to.
My life that I had built was in another city with different people.
After awhile I got an apartment with a friend from college.
And that place feels like my home.
It’s only shared with one other person, not my whole family,
Or 3 other roommates and a dog.
It’s a space that I can make entirely my own.
Then I met you.
Your home is the town beside my parents town.
It makes me wonder, where is my home?
What is home?
Because you feel like home to me too.
A place where I know I’m safe and loved.
A place where I can be my true self.
A place where I’m comfortable and can rest.
I’ve always heard that home isn’t a place, but the people who make you feel like you’re at home.
And if that’s true, I have homes in 4 cities.
It’s filling and draining to have your heart spread across the land.
The people you call home all in different places.
It’s a strange feeling, but I know it’s also part of growing up.
When I was a kid I associated home with a place that had all your things, all your family, and everything centralized.
I’ve come to feel that home isn’t the place where I live for now,
but the people that I do life with and love with all my being.
m.h.
When I was a kid, home was the place where I spent my days with my brother and sister.
My parents were there.
My dogs were there.
I had never known any other place where I could rest my head every night.
When I graduated from high school, home changed.
I moved to the city and slept there every night instead.
Home was my dorm with my friends and a view of the skyscrapers.
But it didn’t feel like home,
At least not all the way.
The people I had spent my entire life with weren’t there with me.
My heart was spread across two cities.
When I left the dorms I moved into a townhouse in the park and that was home for a while.
My new friends were there.
That house hosted so many parties, movie nights, and therapy sessions with my roommates.
We filled that home with love, good food, and memories.
Once I graduated I moved back in with my parents.
Technically I was “home”, but it didn’t feel like it used to.
My life that I had built was in another city with different people.
After awhile I got an apartment with a friend from college.
And that place feels like my home.
It’s only shared with one other person, not my whole family,
Or 3 other roommates and a dog.
It’s a space that I can make entirely my own.
Then I met you.
Your home is the town beside my parents town.
It makes me wonder, where is my home?
What is home?
Because you feel like home to me too.
A place where I know I’m safe and loved.
A place where I can be my true self.
A place where I’m comfortable and can rest.
I’ve always heard that home isn’t a place, but the people who make you feel like you’re at home.
And if that’s true, I have homes in 4 cities.
It’s filling and draining to have your heart spread across the land.
The people you call home all in different places.
It’s a strange feeling, but I know it’s also part of growing up.
When I was a kid I associated home with a place that had all your things, all your family, and everything centralized.
I’ve come to feel that home isn’t the place where I live for now,
but the people that I do life with and love with all my being.
m.h.
