i hurt myself because i have control. u can't reach me. ur fingernails cant shatter my glass skin anymore.
i hurt myself because at least i know i gave myself consent. i didnt give u consent. u broke every promise u ever made me and i should have known from the start that u would take me away from myself.
u know, i accepted the love that i thought i deserved. i am nothing. i am nothing but nothing. i am nothing because i cannot escape u, i cannot escape ur words, i cannot escape ur screams, ur "shut up and let it happen", ur "i know u want it"
why wasn't i strong enough? why didnt i think ahead? i hurt myself because it makes ur hurt a little less strong. i take pieces of my heart away from myself as if u haven't already taken away all of me. u took me. u took my feelings of genuine love and forgiveness and u ******* buried them. so i hurt myself, because maybe if i hurt myself enough u won't have the ability to do it urself.