i could just run away from the feelings

stuffed in a ***** little bottle

however the actions of others are not determined my the restless beating of my heart.



first went the girl with the long blonde hair

guns and helicopters and doctors' appointments

her backpack was passed around, making it lighter when it returned.



the tall boy opened his mouth next

tumors and legs and feeling alone

his package, too, was passed around for a lighter carry.



the girl with the round glasses looked up

police and fathers and lost purity

everyone took from her heavy bag to loosen the load.



the thin boy with the cuts spoke too

custody and friends and playdates

his luggage was considerably lighter by the time it came back.



the short girl with the large jacket decided to go

voices and death and silence

her satchel was not as full when it was placed back in her trembling hands.



finally, words jumbled at my lips

toxicity. guilt. shame. 

i couldn't hold back, my pack was too heavy

anxiety. fear. dread.

i had to take some weight off of me

anger. rage. hurt.



i opened my eyes, expecting pools of disgust on their faces

instead i see i thousand, shattered, mirrors staring back at me.