my misery
  doesn't particularly like company
but sometimes it likes tequila

tequila makes me sleepy
  at least then i can take a break
from thinking

what i want
  no one will give me

i need someone else to acknowledge
the reality and horror of this construction

i found a cure
  for unrelenting
and unreturned
desire
and friendship

it is misery and hopelessness.

i used to be self-righteous and holy
until i knew better
i listened and heard silence
i'm on my own

where i was hesitant
   i want to be bold
self-conscious
   i want to be free

but i'm hot
  my ankle is chained
    i'm rejected
      i'm miserable

and i just want to lay on the floor
for a year or two
with a thimbleful of tequila
and straighten things out.