tw: self harm


How do I go back?
How do I walk in there
As a failure.
What a heavy burden I’ve picked up
I probably don’t need to carry it
But I don’t know how to put it down

Although
There’s this urge
Something to be my painkiller
My distraction
My ****** punishment
It would keep me from thinking
Alleviate the guilt
Because I’ve let them down
Let everyone down
And I’ll tell myself I was sick
Do anything to absolve myself
Run from responsibility
But it’s my fault.
I just.... I just need to release it
I need to see it
Dripping... delicately...
Down my wrist....
And then... only then...
Will I be able to breathe