I pray this prayer
when I feel scared
Not safety from others
But from my own hands
I am the most dangerous
When i’m stuck in my head
Sad thoughts arise
And I think
What would be different
if i leave in a blink
I could end this all now
But what happens next
Ill cause more pain
And my mother would never forgive herself
But sometimes its her fault
And sometimes it not
But the things i plead
to the  lord above
If you heard
You would understand why I can't leave my thoughts untouched
I ask him to heal my broken heart
And to seal the deep tears
And make life something I can bear
To stop feeling empty
And  make me want to be here
But then
this brings the tears
Sometimes i don't hear an answer back
And I feel like i'm not close enough to God
So now, again I pray
so i can find that bond
So lord please forgive me
Please spear me
This hurt is something
That keeps me from standing
I just need some type of love
Some connection from above
Or something simple
A healthy relationship
But don't take it away again
That's a grave, already dug
I cant take anymore hurt
So i'm holding my breath
Until you give me something real
Ill hold on my chest
I’ll hold my heart still
So that I can focus on you
So I don’t give my heart
To someone it shouldn’t belong to.