I cut my face the other day to make a cool scar.
Ive done it on my chest a few times no problem but the blade was rusted and dull. This was a proper razor so i didnt account for the sharpness and made a ******* fissure on my cheek. I put some scotch tape on it and went to go grab my mail. The lady grimmaced, i said "yeet".
to my close acqauntences i said it was a cat.
"******* vicious cat" said jimmy john.
My life is that dull.

Green onions go in macaroni salad
not the white ones. It's too bitter otherwise.

We love you alex trebec.