08/28/19
12:46am

just a note. it's so hard to be grateful for what you have when you're always comparing yourself to people who seem better off-- whose lives seem prettier and brighter, when your life happens to feel like it's just been on repeat for the past couple of years, coupled with feelings of insecurities and uncertainty about the future.

over the years, i've found myself longing for more and more aesthetically pleasing things, which is exactly the opposite of the culture I originate from, in which every aspect is anything but pleasing and light-felt. in a sense, maybe it's a part of me rebelling in the quietest way possible-- by knowing that I can appreciate and yearn for something that my parents and relatives wouldn't ever understand or get.

well, here's to the end of another day and the beginning of the next.