Five in the morning
she called me up
I'll be busy today
Could you take care of Whiskers
my cat?

Ain't nobody got time for that
I thought
I'll be there at 6
I said

Seven o'clock
I rang the doorbell
You're late
Have you ever taken care
of a cat before?

You should be glad I'm even at your door
I thought
Leave me a note, I'll be sleeping a few more hours
I said

Lunch time
I awoke with a jolt
What the ****
are you doing
scratching my ******* face?

And so I gave the cat a chase
I thought,
I didn't sign up for this.

Four in the afternoon
she called me up
I'll be home by five
Did you even look at
my note?

Could barely understand what you wrote
I thought
I didn't sign up for this
I said

Nobody forced you
She said

It's not like I had a choice
I thought
It's not like I had a choice
I said

Five on the dot
She rang the doorbell
Where's my little Whiskers?
Where's my baby?
Was the big bully mean to you?

Save your breath, the cat bid adieu
I thought
It's gone. I chased it out
I said

What the ****
she screamed
The **** did you do
she blamed
Where the **** is my cat?
she demanded

I freed Whiskers
I said

What the ****
she screamed
The **** did you do
she blamed
Don't you ******* love me anymore?
she demanded

No

Curiosity killed our love
and I freed Whiskers