I tried
So hard
To be where you are
Dancing with the stars
Yet
I only made it as far as the mountain top
Unable to take my feet off of the ground
Tethered to it
By countless lines
Invisible to your blissful sight
For you are dancing with the stars
Twisting, laughing among them,
Whilst I am twisting,
Crying alone
Yearning to be by your side
And say
I am here, too
So don't you ever cry alone
Friend
I hear you cry
The tears of an angel

As you frolic
With the others
Just please
Remember me..
Just once
Where you embrace me
Without me saying a word
Would be enough
To make my heart soar
Brighten my day

I know
This isn't right
But I can't help it
Begging you
Because I feel like I'm losing you
To everyone else
And it scares me..

When I pass by
Will I get so much as a "Hi!"?
Even that would be enough
It would be enough

I'm waiting here
For you
Again
Hoping you see me
From over there
Across the room
Laughing with them..

How badly I wish I were one of them
How desperately I wish I could change the past
Alas
I cannot
For it is too far gone
And no matter what I say
No matter what I do
It'll never be enough
And I know that
But please
Forgive me...
Friend, forgive me...

I never meant to hurt you
I just didn't know what to do
You were so easy to talk to
So kind, and understanding
I didn't realize it then
But I was killing you
Burdening you
And what now?

So many times
I've tried to apologize
But nothing
Nothing
Can make up for my mistakes
So instead
Of falling over myself in guilt
I just ask this,
In all seriousness,
Not a shallow answer,
But truly...
Do you forgive me?

I only want to see you smile
Carefree, and happy
Not weighed down by anything
And if you are
I am beside you
In spirit
So just seek me out
Give me a call
I will come
Ready to listen
To help, if you want me to
All you need to do
Is ask me
And I will come

Trust me
Is all I ask
Because I'll be there
Whenever you call me
Just say my name
And I'm on my way
No matter how far away
If you need me
I will come
Bounding through the thickets
To you

Anything
To be back to the way it was
Before

Laughing, smiling,
Seated side by side
Like we ought to be
Once again

- Jay M
June 23rd, 2019