to get into a car
is such a valuable suggestion
to go places
you've never suggested
to predict the future
of the path less taken
or rather known
in signs of an injunction


to reach a car
a moving vehicle, that is
to not experience the case of lethal injection
although not taken my body
nor forced
this type is called anxiety


this type is called
I wish you could see
personally struggling
what you caused in me.
to be never encountered, by you.

I'm ashamed that there is a power you hold over me
and within a few hundred miles
within a distance of no reciprocation

you have that power
the power I should not digest

stringing along with my mind
slowly waiting for it to die
not a horrible death but you along with it

you see, I'm terrified
of reaching the road
any of which are paved out
nor drunk or sober me
can handle this disease

unspoken for now...
although one day

I'll be free.
free from you
free from the road
anxiety in a diff level