You take an aspirin a day
Because they say it's a miracle drug
In a few days your blood pressure is raised,
Prescribed losartan from a doctor
But only a dollar copay,
the insurance pays and all is ok. Ok?

You wake up with dizziness and muscle cramps,
You can't take the pain, no problem.
"Just take some meclizine and tizanidine.
All those side effects will go away."
But the muscle relaxant makes me drowsy
In the morning, it makes me unable to focus at all.
"Naturally, here try low dose Adderall!"

That seems to be working but now
I can't seem to sleep well through the night.
My body is tired but my mind stills spins.
"I've got it, just five milligrams of Ambien."
So a losartan, meclizine, tizanidine, Adderall, Ambien, oh and my aspirin.
And all is ok, ok?

Doctor, I don't know what to do,
I take everything you tell me to
And I just don't feel like I'm myself.
"Sir, take some sertraline, it will help,
It sounds like your depressed"
And doctor something in this mix
Is causing horrid back pain
"No problem, some pain killers
You'll feel like yourself again."

You take an aspirin a day
Because they say it's a miracle drug